Sunday, May 23, 2010

None of us is as strong as all of us!

What an amazing weekend!

I spend 3 days on training to become a Scream Free Certified Leader. ScreamFree Parenting is very much a revolutionary new option for parenting, that's is heart-centered. The beauty of it as I see it, is that it encourages parents to focus on themselves, grow themselves up, and calm themselves down. The ScreamFree Parenting principles support parents of all ages (with kids of all ages) in creating the families they not only have dreamed of but deserve.

One of the most amazing things I discovered for my own journey this weekend is the living expression of what my friend Amy Hillbrich Davis of Inspiring Moms told me once: none of us is as strong as all of us!

I feel so blessed to know there are other people, resources and programs out there that feel just as passionate as I do about changing the world. It's so exciting and encouraging! I love to connect with amazing people that understand that we change the world starting at the basic unit: the family.

I came across this story that illustrates the idea of supporting moms on the journey of motherhood in order for our world to be better for EVERYONE!

Did you hear about the farmer with great ears? Each year his yummy yellow corn won blue ribbons in corn competitions. When asked his secret by a journalist, this farmer replied, "I share my corn seed with all my neighbors." The journalist baffled, asked, "Huh?!?!" The farmer smiled,and explained: "It is like this.. the wind picks up pollen from ripening corn and cross-pollinates it from field to field. If my neighbors grow inferior corn, they lower the quality of my corn. Meaning, if I want to greedily grow the best-est corn ever, I must help my neighbors grow their best-est corn too".

I can personally testify that not only is it good for everyone when we all win. It also feels darn good!

Many blessings on your parenting journey!

Sandra

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Look with your eyes not with your mouth!!



Am I the only one?

Tonight as I was getting our daughter ready for bed, I had to remind her that she needed to stay in her room, as opposed to coming into mine every 5 minutes with some complaint: too cold, too itchy, too thirsty, my tummy hurts, my head hurts, my hair hurts!! YIKES!

I told her that it was time to go to bed and that she needed to stay in bed unless... But that was as long as I got before she rolled her eyes and repeated the same mantra I tell her every night: "unless I am on fire. I know mom, you've told me".

I have to admit that I have repeated them many times a day, some days more than others. The funny thing is that it seems that our 8 year old is completely immune to them: they have no effect in most anything she does! But I can guarantee you that next time the opportunity shows up, I'll say one of the infamous "momisms" that either I have made up myself or remember from my days growing up as the oldest of 3 daughters.

I hope I am not alone. I am sure the phrases we use vary from mom to mom, from family to family. Some times the words just roll off your tongue before you can think about them. This is particularly poignant when you swore, in the privacy of your own mind, that you would NEVER do what your mom did and repeat these useless phrases.

My big wake up call came the first time I heard our daughter then only 2, telling a friend who couldn't sit still at our dinner table, "if you eat, you sit". I stopped me on my tracks!

I wonder: is the fact that we do it just like our parents did, a sign that eventually the rote training takes?

Which "momisms" are you fond of?? I'd love to hear what you never thought would come out of your mouth and has!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Is your child ready for Kindergarten??



It’s that time of the year when parents start thinking about the end of the school year and the decisions they need to make about pre-K or Kindergarten. Many questions come to mind: Will my child be ready to start in a classroom with a different routine? Is she learning everything she needs for Kindergarten readiness? Should I hold him back a year and wait for him to mature some more?

Many parents worry about their child’s first day in kindergarten, because they are concerned that the child might feel scared or lost, or that learning to get along with a group of new children might be overwhelming. Most children do just fine and are excited about entering into this new phase of their learning!
Here are 3 simple ideas to help you (and your child) prepare for the transition:
  1. Keep it upbeat and positive. Keeping the topic of school positive and exciting is crucial. Make sure that anxiety and stress do not influence your child's feelings about starting school.
  2. Be Sensitive. Validate your child's fears and reassure him that it is going to be all right. Make sure to remind him that he has succeeded in new challenges in the past, and will be fine with this new challenge too. You can use yourself as an example: share how you have been nervous in the past too about starting something new, like a new class, a new neighborhood or a new job. Also, remind your child of situation when he had felt the “jitters” in the past and how he handled it well, like a little league game or a piano recital.
  3. Adjust Schedules Early. Don't wait until the day before school starts to give your child an earlier bedtime or wake up call. It will make everyone’s morning a lot less stressful if your child knows in advance what’s expected of him that first day of school.
It is also very helpful to meet his teacher before school starts and to walk the halls of his new school in mid-August. It will make both of you more comfortable and off to a great start!!!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

No more Victoria Secret!!



I got home today after picking up our daughter up from school. I checked the mail and had 5 catalogs in my mail box, none of which I had requested!! The funny thing is that I keep getting Victoria Secrets catalog even though there's no secret that since I had our daughter there's very little out of that catalog I feel like wearing!!

I was wondering if I was the only one who got inundated with catalogs just about every day. Here’s what I found: Americans get about 19 billion catalogs a year (at a cost of 53 million trees).

If you are anything like me and feel moved to do your part on saving trees and also save yourself from having to deal with a mailbox jammed with catalogs you don’t want: I discovered that you can change all that just by going and STOP all catalogs that are cluttering your mailbox and your home. Simply go to: www.catalogchoice.org and check off which catalogs you will gladly opt out of.

You can kiss waste good-bye and empower yourself to have a little less clutter to deal with. Every little piece of peace is always welcome!

What simple things are you doing to help you manage your home? I’d love to hear your ideas!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Motherhood: A work in progress!

thesoulfulparent.com, busy moms, momsI was all prepared today to write some heartfelt, moving tribute to the most amazing job in the world: Motherhood, one fitting of such an auspicious day as Mother’s Day. Not that I think there’s only one day to celebrate moms: My husband has always told our daughter that although Mother’s Day is like a birthday where you highlight your gratitude for what your mom does, if that is the only time you are nice to Mom, we are in big trouble!

Well, it’s clear that no matter how long I am a mom, how many books I read or how much training I have: I have a long journey ahead of me. I still have to go back and ask for a “do-over”, take words back and tell my 8 year old “I am sorry, mommy messed up”.

Today was one of those days. We were working on our vegetable garden (please read “our vegetable garden”) and our daughter was loving the feel of the dirt under her fingers, the wind on her face, the warm sun after days of rain. She was fascinated about the fact that Life has a way of creating a whole plant out of a seed and even more marveled at the fact that the seed knew just what to do, given the right conditions. Yours truly was getting too warm and impatient, exasperated that our daughter was taking forever to pour more dirt, place the seeds and then had the audacity to take her sweet time writing the little labels so we could tell later what we were growing. I wanted to be done and move on to the next project for the day! I was totally focused on the next thing instead of enjoying every step of this process and the opportunity to see it through the eyes of a first timer: our curious 8 year old!

As I tried to move her along, she turned around and in frustration told me without hesitation: “Don’t rush me Mom. This is my garden too!” Ouch! It was at that moment that I realized I was missing out (again) on a great opportunity to enjoy the moment, right there, instead of being in a rush to get more done. I didn’t say a word for a minute or two. I took a deep breath and swallow my motherly, I-know-better-than-you-missy, I-have-so-much-to-do-today-thank-you-very-much attitude and said “You know what? You are right. I am sorry I am rushing you”.

So the moral of the story for me today is that no matter how many parenting books I have on my shelf or how many times I coach moms on being present and in the moment or how many clients I have successfully coached, one thing is for sure: Motherhood is a work in progress!!!

(this is the picture of our proud daughter and OUR vegetable garden!)